Welcome to "Pumping Up" with Hans and Franz

Yah! Welcome to "Pumping Up". I am Hans

And I am Franz

And we're here to pump <clap> you up.

Tonight we're going to talk to you about flexing.

Yah. Flexing is very important. I mean, what's the point of pumping up if you can't flex to show off your Arnold-like biceps?

(H&F flex in various poses)

That's right. And to start things off we want to introduce you to someone who is an expert on flexing.

Yah. He is a big media star, just like Arnold, and tonight he is going to come up here and flex for you.

Yah. Everyone give a big Arnold-size welcome to Bill Walsh.

What is your secret Bill?

(Bill says something)

Flex with us Bill.

(H&F&Bill flex in various poses)

Thank you Bill!

And now before we show you our flexing program, we would like to share with you some Arnold news.

Yah. We have found Arnold's Top Ten Rejected Movie Lines.

10. My, What a lovely lacy doily.

9. Oww! A Papercut!

8. Man-Oh-Man! Do I love fudge!

7. When I think of you, I touch myself.

6. Do you have any of those "Ouch-Less" band-aids?

5. Can you please open this jar of olives for me?

4. Time to make the doughnuts, You Bastard!

3. Can you just let me keep the credit cards?

2. Help me, Bill, Help Me!

1. Who else loves show tunes?

Now we will show you how important flexing is.

Yah but to do this we need a girly-man to demonstrate.

Yah. That's right. You, yah, you girly-man. Come up here and we show you how to flex.

(H&F flex in various poses)

Now, girly-man, get into the gym and start flexing.

(H&F push GM behind screen)

When you are flexing you must not forget any part of your body.

That's right. No part must go un-flexed.

Yah. And we have some products here which will help you get a total flex workout.

First, for your hair, you must use Flex shampoo.

That's right. See it says right here: "Body Building". It has extra protein.

Here, girly-man.

Then you must flex your eyes with this "Flex-Care".

Yah, that's right. And your lips, your lips, too. You must use these "Flexi-straws".

All right girly-man. Are you all pumped up?

(GM answers affirmatively)

That's good. OK. Come on out and show all these girly-men what our total flex workout can do.

(Arnold...No? Oh well,...Manly man emerges from behind screen)

Yah, that's much better.

OK now. Flex.

(H&F&MM flex in various poses)

This has been pumping up with Hans and Franz.